[chapter eight]

(January 27, 2001)

"I couldn't possibly be any more nervous than I am at this moment." Caitlin said.

"Gee, can't imagine why. About to be photographed as JC's one true love, about to watch him perform in front of 800 million people, and about to kill me if I can't get your hair to go right." Allison said as she tried to tuck a curl of Caitlin's hair behind her ear. The two girls were standing in the dressing room of the guys, getting Caitlin ready to have some "candid" photos (which were not going to be very candid) taken before she headed out to her seats to watch the game. Allison and Lonnie would be watching the game with her, so at least she wouldn't be sitting alone. She had been calm all day, but the reality of the situation had hit about 5 minutes before, so Allison was doing her best to make Caitlin relax.

"You can never make my hair go right. Don't bother trying." Caitlin said good-naturedly. "They may as well see me as I am, right?" She asked, smoothing down her khakis and twinset. "You sure I don't look matronly or dowdy or something?"

"You look very classy and euro-chic. So stop worrying." Allison reassured her.

"You think I'm worried. I don't think Josh slept a wink last night...I wouldn't be surprised if she fell asleep on stage. For him not to sleep at night is major. This is a guy who's fallen asleep standing up in the shower before." Caitlin said.

"How do you know?" Allison teased lightly. Before Caitlin could answer, Allison grabbed her hand and pulled her towards the door. "Come on, let's get some pictures in before we head to our seats."

Moments later, Caitlin was escorted to a waiting room where a photographer sat patiently, waiting for them. Allison had arranged for her and Caitlin to have some pictures taken together, rather than some awkward ones of Caitlin by herself, then for JC to join them briefly for a few photos. Rather than staging "publicity photos", the photographer was going to try and make some natural shots come together. Caitlin and Allison flopped down on a sofa lit brightly by the photographer and tried to look natural. Unsuccessfully. "Girls, girls. Just relax. Have a conversation, drink some coffee, anything. Don't look so scared. This is fun." He said in a clipped accent, readying his camera.

Caitlin and Allison merely looked at each other before bursting into laughter, to the point where they didn't notice the flashing of the camera. "This is craziness." Caitlin gasped. "But if they turn out, I want copies of this!"

"I second that!" Allison agreed, as the girls smiled and teased each other. Within minutes, the photographer had taken several rolls of film, and was ready for JC to join them.

"Can someone get Mr. Chasez, please?" He asked. Moments later, an assistant escorted JC into the room, whose face broke into a bright smile at the sight of Caitlin.

"Hi baby." He said, pulling her close and kissing her lightly, unaware of the photographer's camera flashes. "I missed seeing you this morning." He added.

"Well, I'm glad you let me sleep for an extra 6 or 7 hours." Caitlin teased. "You exhausted yet?"

"Pretty much running on fumes at this point. But I'm sure the adrenaline will kick in soon." He answered. Smiling over Caitlin's head, JC acknowledged Allison, standing a few feet away. "Hey Evans. How are ya?"

"Good. Good. Why don't I get out of the way and let you love birds 'look natural'." Allison joked, stepping behind the photographer. Caitlin laughed again at Allison's teasing of the photographer, then wrapped JC in a quick hug.

"If I don't tell you later, you were great." Caitlin said sincerely.

"Thank you, sweetie." JC said, smiling down at her. "I have no idea when we're going to get out of here tonight, but will I see you?" He asked. The photographer noticed the look of affection and happiness between the couple in front of him, the look the showed they were totally oblivious to the world around them, and quickly snapped the perfect photo before the moment was gone.

"Why don't I just meet you at your place whenever you get there? I don't have to work tomorrow, since I took the day off, so I'm free to sleep in as long as I want." Caitlin said happily.

"Sounds good. I'll see you back home sometime. Can you make sure Baron hasn't starved to death when you get there?" JC asked sheepishly.

"Will do." Caitlin replied. "He's so abused and all." She teased, and JC laughed. "He gets better treatment than my roommates."

"Well, your roommates aren't as well behaved as Baron." JC replied. "Though he has recently taken to chewing part of the couch."

"I saw that. I encouraged him, of course. Anything to get rid of that damn thing." Caitlin said, smiling.

"Hey!" JC said indignantly.

Throughout the course of their conversation, then had been smiling happily at each other, wrapping arms around each other, and generally acting like two people in love do when they are total unaware of the world around them. The photographer's eye picked up these nuances, and unobtrusively snapped a million photos, trying to capture the love between the two of them. Allison stood to the side, smiling as two people had a normal conversation in very unreal circumstances. She could admire anyone willing to try and make things so normal is this business. Glancing at the time, she tapped the photographer on the shoulder to end the session.

"JC, you better fly. Caitlin, why don't we head out to our seats?" Allison said as the photographer began to pack up his wares. "Good luck tonight, JC." She added.

"Thanks Allison. And thanks for babysitting Caitlin. She gets a bit rowdy during football games." JC teased, swatting Caitlin lightly on the behind with a grin.

"Why don't you go away?" Caitlin said seriously, but with a teasing glint in her eye.

After saying their goodbyes, JC retreated to the ready room, and Allison and Caitlin, accompanied by Lonnie, headed for the stadium. In order to do that, they had to walk past lots of the accumulated fans that would be running onto the field during the halftime show. Almost immediately, cries went up from some of the fans for Allison, who was recognized from her profile on the webpage.

"Allison, over here!" "Allison, can I have your autograph!" "Allison, where are the guys?" "Allison, who's with you?" "Allison!"

Caitlin blinked at the sudden onslaught of fans, then quickly put a smile on her face. Allison grabbed her hand and they walked over to some fans that looked about 18. "Hi there." Allison greeted them. "Excited about the show?"

"Oh yeah!" The responded. Allison shook hands and even signed a few autographs, then introduced Caitlin. "Hey guys, say hi to Caitlin Peck. She's here with JC."

"Are you his girlfriend?" One girl asked immediately. "The one he mentioned on Larry King?"

Caitlin was unsure what to answer, so she looked to Allison, who nodded emphatically. "Yeah, I am." Caitlin said, blushing slightly. "Nice to meet you."

"Omigod. You are like, the luckiest girl on earth." One of them gushed.

"Thanks." Caitlin said, taking a small breath. "They are all great guys to hang out with."

"Actually, I'm doing a profile on Caitlin for the website so you guys can learn more about her." Allison added.

"Cool. Is JC like, even hotter in person?"

"Well, I think so. And he certainly dresses better normally than he does on stage, thank goodness." Caitlin said teasingly.

"How long have you guys been together?"

"Several months. We both live in Orlando, and since they've been working on the album, I've seen him quite a bit. But that will probably change when the tour starts. You guys are all going, right?" Caitlin asked, smiling.

"Omigod! Yeah! You know it!" Came the replies.

"Is Justin still with Britney?" "Does Lance have a girlfriend?" "When's the album coming out?" Questions bombarded the two girls, some personal and some not so personal. They stayed and answered as many questions as they could, then shook hands and turned to walk to their seats.

"Hey!" One of the voices called. Caitlin turned around and faced a college-age fan. "You seem really nice. JC is lucky. Too bad you took him before I had the chance to." The young girl smiled and laughed.

Caitlin gave her a grin. "Well, you know, Lance is still single." She winked as the girls started to laugh.

"Thanks for the tip." Came the answer from the girls as Allison and Caitlin walked away.

"Whew! That was interesting." Caitlin said as they took their seats right as the game introductions began.

"Get used to it, Mrs. Chasez." Allison teased. "You did great."

"I felt like an idiot." Caitlin said. "But at least they were nice fans, not the rip-my-face-off-because-I-stole-JC fans."

"True. Either way, by tomorrow, you'll be a star. Between word of mouth and the website, everyone will know you." Allison said.

"Gee, just what a quiet librarian from the suburbs always wanted." Caitlin rolled her eyes slightly.

"You'll live." Allison said. "And isn't JC worth it?"

"If anybody were worth it, it's JC."

**
"Baby? You awake?" JC asked quietly as he walked into the bedroom. He could see Caitlin's sleeping form under the sheet in the moonlight coming in through the window. He quietly removed his shoes and began to pull off his shirt when Caitlin stirred slightly.

"I don't know how you are still standing, because after your performance, I was exhausted." Caitlin said softly, not moving in the bed.

JC chuckled softly. "I think that rush of adrenaline is about to run out, and not a moment too soon." He paused. "So, what's the verdict?"

"It's a good thing Chris warned me about the possibility of fire, or I would be yelling at you for not telling me you were going to set your hand aflame." Caitlin said.

JC laughed again as he removed the rest of his clothes and slid into bed, suddenly worn out from the evening's activities. "But other than the possibility of igniting ourselves?"

"I thought it went really well. You guys looked fantastic. Britney didn't do much to add to the performance for me, but I'm sure everyone else liked it." Caitlin said fairly.

"Well, she was sort of a last minute addition. We couldn't get over the shirt she was wearing." JC said evenly.

"I'll bet not." Caitlin said sarcastically.

"Oh sweetie...I like you in tighter shirts much better, don't worry. You put her fakes to shame." JC said cajolingly.

"You sweet talker." Caitlin teased.

"How about this one...slide on over here and give me some lovin'." JC said in a husky voice, even though Caitlin knew he was teasing. Without a moment's hesitation, she slid her body over to his and planted a kiss on his lips.

"Since when do you sleep naked?" He whispered.

"Since I started taking up residence at your house." She whispered back. "No way in hell would I ever sleep naked in my house." JC snickered and pulled her closer.

"I can live with that." JC said, raining kisses on her shoulders and neck.

"I thought you were tired." She said teasingly.

"I seem to have found about my eighteenth wind." JC said softly. "Interested?"

"Is the Pope catholic?"

**

Several hours later, JC was jolted awake. Beside him, Caitlin was writhing in the bed, and groaning softly. As he awoke more, he could make out the words she was saying over and over.

"Stop it. Stop it. I'm sorry, please don't hurt me. I'm sorry. Ray, no. Please. Stop. Ray, stop it. No. NO. NO!!"

JC grabbed her arm and began shaking her. "Cait, wake up. Caitie. Wake up. Wake up!" He continued to shake her until suddenly her eyes flew open. She gasped and sat frozen for a moment before bolting upright in bed and flinging herself into JC's arms. Within moments, tears were streaming down her face.

"Shh. Shh. It's ok. It was just a dream. It's over now." JC whispered comfortingly, wrapping his arms around her and smoothing his hand over her hair. "It's ok."

Caitlin sobbed softly for a minute, then the tears subsided and she rested in JC's arms. Slowly, JC pulled her away from him so he could look into her eyes. Gently, he brushed away the remaining tears on her cheeks, his heart breaking. She had look so frightened and scared when she finally awoke. And the fact that she had said Ray's name...

"I'm sorry." Caitlin said. "I didn't mean to wake you."

"Right. I'm pretty mad about that right now." JC said softly, not mad at all.

"I've had this same nightmare on and off since last summer. Basically a replay of what really happened with Ray, only worse." Caitlin said quietly.

"Why are you still having it?" JC asked.

Caitlin swallowed hard, then looked into his blue eyes that were filled with concern. "Well, to be honest...Ray's been sending me letters and calling me." She whispered. "I didn't want to tell you, because I thought it was nothing, and I didn't want you to be upset or think it was something it wasn't." She began. "After the first few letters, I began just tearing them up without reading them, and I don't speak to him on the phone. I just don't know how he found me. None of the guys or I have been in touch with him."

"Has he threatened you?" JC asked worriedly.

"Just threatened to come down here and see me. But I don't think he really would. He's a coward at heart. Mostly it's just how sorry he is, how much he loves me, all the same old stuff. I've put him behind me, but I guess my subconscious interprets into dreams every once in a while. But I'm not scared. I have you to protect me." Caitlin said, smiling.

"If he threatens you again, I'm putting security on you." JC said seriously.

"No way. I don't want to be tailed by Lonnie like you are all the time." Caitlin said. "It's nothing. I swear. I'm just working through some stuff I think." She added, snuggling back into his arms.

"I don't buy that." JC said. "You sure you're ok?"

"I'm sure. You were here to wake me up. That makes me ok." Caitlin said. JC, though not thoroughly convinced, slid down into the sheets beside her and wrapped his arms protectively around her. "I love you." She said softly.

"I love you too. And I will never hurt you." JC said with conviction.

"I know." Caitlin said, knowing it was true in all her heart.

chapter nine