[chapter nine]
Disclaimer: If you've heard of them, I don't own them. Everything else is mine, so no stealing, pretty please. ;-)
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~Shea's POV~
I can't believe he came over.
I can't believe it.
I don't know if I should be angry or upset or grateful and happy.
Or all of the above.
But he's here now. And I'm so happy he is.
Now, I just have to explain Mama to him. I turn to him, his eyes full of confusion and concern. "She's got advanced Alzheimer's. Some days are better than others, some she doesn't remember … " I trail off, my voice low as I try to explain. Jimmie nods in understanding, then lets go of my hand to step towards my mother.
"Hi, Mrs. Waterson. My name is Jimmie. That's a very pretty dress you're wearing."
Mama smiles beatifically at him and I feel a swell of hope in my heart. "Thank you. You are very good looking. Are you a friend of Samuel's?"
Jimmie smiles and takes her tiny hand in his. "No, I haven't met Samuel. But I'm friends with Shea. Do you want to tell me about Samuel?"
I watch, amazed, as this man morphs from the teasing, confident man I know to a totally reassuring, attentive man who is dealing with a woman who doesn't remember her own name some days.
I think I could love him, given half a chance.
"Yes. I'll tell you about Samuel." She says happily. "Sit down. You're too tall."
Jimmie laughs and sits down on the floor beside her, before looking up to me. "Why don't you take a quick break. We'll be fine for a minute. You look like you could use one." He says softly to me and I want to cry at his words.
He read my mind.
If I had to spend one more minute in this house alone with my mother, I might have gone crazy. I nod and mouth 'thank you' to him, and he smiles in return.
I slide out of the room as I hear Jimmie turn back to my mother and begin talking again. "So, is Samuel as good looking as me?" He says easily and I can hear my mother laugh at his words.
I smile as I grab a jacket and step out the front door, sitting down on the front stoop, happy just to sit for a moment and watch the sun set.
I can't believe he came over.
Lost in my own thoughts, I don't even hear the front door open and close minutes later and jump as Jimmie sits down beside me. "Mama … " I say, turning to get up and go inside but Jimmie puts a hand on my shoulder to stop me.
"She's asleep. She'll be fine for a minute." He says reassuringly and I take a deep breath, not sure what to say to him.
"I know you didn't want me to come over here, to ever pick you up here. Why?" He asks, not unkindly, just curiously.
I shrug. "I don't know. It's so hard … I never know how she's going to be … "
He nods, watching the horizon. "You look tired." He says a few moments later, brushing my hair back with his hand.
I close my eyes, trying not to cry. He wraps an arm around my shoulders and pulls me to him, pressing a kiss to my temple. "I'm so tired, Jimmie. I'm so tired of all of this."
"How long as she … "
"It's been coming on for several years, but it really advanced quickly. I came home two years ago, when she … she couldn't take care of herself anymore, and she won't let anyone near her."
"Except you."
"Except me. And not even me, some days."
"What happened today?" Jimmie asks me. "The emergency?"
I half laugh, afraid I'll cry otherwise. "Right after the day nurse left, she … she set fire to the curtains. She said she was cold."
"Oh baby." He says, pulling
me close as the first tears fall.