[chapter twelve]
Disclaimer: If you've heard of them, I don't own them. Everything else is mine, so no stealing, pretty please. ;-)
**
~Jeff's POV~
I'm not kidding.
I am profoundly fucked up.
Not only because I'm sorta in love with Madelyn, but because I can't admit it, probably screwed it up before it started, and because there's no way she would like me anyway.
Yeah.
I'm just a scared, fucked up dumbass of a man.
**flashback**
I can't believe I just did that.
We just did that.
But we did. And she's curled up beside me, sleeping peacefully, her arms still wrapped around my body.
And she feels so good.
But…this can't work.
She doesn't like me.
I don't even know if I like her.
I'm still trying to figure out…well, everything.
And, then there's the whole 'she doesn't really like me' thing.
I took advantage of her. I goaded her. I…I practically made her go to bed with me.
I gotta get out of her before she wakes up.
And if I'm lucky, I'll never, ever see her again.
But maybe that would be worse.
Fuck.
**end flashback**
"I said I was sorry, and I meant it." I say, daring to look up and meet Madelyn's eyes.
"Why did you?"
"Why did I what?"
"You know what, you jackass." She says, her voice rising slightly. "Why did you run out on me like a scared little girl while you knew I was asleep? No note, no nothing. Was I that…"
Oh god, don't even think it.
"…bad a lay?" She asks bitterly and I wince and squeeze my eyes shut as she echoes the very words I was hoping she wouldn't say. "I mean, I understand you probably have a track record like Dennis Rodman at this point, but…what?"
She's got to be kidding.
I swear, sometimes the woman has
no sense at all.