[chapter eleven]

(The next morning, Caitlin's house)

"Hello? Anybody home? I come bearing bagels!" Scout bellowed as he kicked the front door shut behind him. Dropping his bags onto the floor in the front hall, he walked into the family room. Curled up on the couch, asleep, was Caitlin. Judging from the smell of coffee emanating from the kitchen, Scout gathered that Jon was also awake and alive in the house. Looking back on Caitlin, he noticed that she had slept in her clothes, and that her makeup was a mess, as though she had been crying. Shaking her softly, Scout woke her up.

"Bird? Honey, you ok?" Scout asked as Jon walked in the room carrying two cups of steaming coffee.

"Ah, I was just about to do that, except I came armed with caffeine." Jon said, setting the mugs down on the coffee table and flopping onto an overstuffed chair.

"Hi guys." Caitlin croaked from the couch, her eyes still shut and her body still curled in the fetal position.

"Hi sleeping beauty. Or not. What happened to you??" Jon asked with concern.

"What? What did I miss? I leave town for a while and everyone had drama?" Scout exclaimed as he dropped onto the other end of the couch from Caitlin.

"Nothing. I had another date with JC. And I don't want to talk about it." Caitlin righted herself and reached for the mug of hot coffee. "Thanks for the breakfast." She nodded to Jon as she took a sip.

"Welcome. So, what happened? Have you been crying?" Jon prodded her.

"Ok, did I not just say I don't want to talk about it? I could have sworn I did..." Caitlin muttered.

"Tough." Scout and Jon said in unison.

Growling, Caitlin got up from the couch. "I'm going to take a really long shower, and then when I return to feeling like a human being, I'll tell you guys everything. Deal?" She asked.

"Deal." Scout said. "Hurry back."

"Ditto." Said Jon.

Caitlin slowly dragged herself upstairs, grimaced when she looked in the mirror, and understood the concern the guys had for her. She looked awful. 45 minutes later, she emerged from the shower, scrubbed and feeling a little better. She had spent what felt like forever under the hot spray of the shower, thinking about the night before. She slipped into a pair of loose jeans and an oversize Georgetown sweatshirt, and quickly dried her hair. She sat on the bed to tie on her running shoes, when all she could envision was the confused look on JC's face the night before. Burying her face in her hands, Caitlin wanted to cry again. "What have I done? I've taken a perfectly nice guy and made it so he'll never want to see me again. Why??" Caitlin thought to herself. Resigning herself to the inevitable discussion waiting for her downstairs, she trudged down to find Scout and Jon waiting for her.

She flopped down on the couch and pulled her legs up under her. Jon and Scout looked at her expectantly, so she just dove right in. "Ok, so we all decided to go dancing last night, and so..."

(An hour later)

"So, basically, I've royally screwed any chance with this guy." Caitlin concluded her lengthy discussion on the happenings of the night before.

"Not necessarily." Jon said reasonably.

Caitlin threw him an extremely skeptical look. "I teased him all night, started to make out with him, freaked, then he left as I started crying." She paused. "Yeah, big chance of him knocking on the door right now."

"I bet you $5 you hear from him again." Scout said.

Caitlin shook his outstretched hand. "If you say so." She rose from the couch and stretched. "I'm going to go for a walk around the neighborhood, get some fresh air."

"Okay." Jon said.

After the front door closed, Scout and Jon looked at each other. "So, what do you think?" Jon asked with concern in his voice.

"I think she was affected more deeply by last summer than we thought. It's obvious she's nuts for this guy, she just doesn't know how to approach it." Scout said.

"Agreed." Jon said. "Well, I don't want to counsel her or push her, but I want to be around if she needs me."

"I hear ya."

About 10 minutes later, Scout heard a knock at the front door. "Did Alex forget his key again?" He asked Jon as he headed to open the door.

"Hi, is Caitlin here?" JC asked skeptically.

"I knew she would owe me $5." Scout answered.

(Outside in Caitlin's neighborhood)

Caitlin walked briskly through the neighborhood, with no particular destination in mind. She was concentrating on not concentratingshe was just absorbing the trees, grass and other houses in her neighborhood. Actually, though she couldn't adjust to the weather yet, Caitlin really did like Orlando, and her neighborhood especially. The neighbors were all really nice and the houses were all really nicely kept. There was even a small pond in the center of the neighborhood with a little waterfall and a gazebo to the side. Caitlin decided to circle the pond then head back to the house. The fresh air had done her a world of good, and she was ready to get on with her day.

Admiring the pond as she circled around it, Caitlin thought back to the night before. She'd had such a good time at the club, and dancing with JC had been awesome. Even though she had been nervous initially, she felt so comfortable with JC, and she trusted him almost implicitly. But then they had started kissing, and things started progressing, and she just froze...

Shaking her head to rid herself of those thoughts, she cut through the backyard to enter the house from the sliding door that leads off the family room. Walking in and closing the door behind her, she shouted to the house in general, "Guys, I'm back!" She took about two steps into the room before her eyes fell on JC, sitting on the couch, watching her.

"J...JC." Caitlin stuttered. "Hi."

"Hi." JC answered. "How are you?" He asked with concern in his voice.

"Well, up until about 5 seconds ago, I was ok." Caitlin responded.

"What happened 5 seconds ago?" He asked.

"I saw you. After that, my carefully crafted dream world where last night didn't happen crumbled around me." Caitlin said with a weak smile.

JC smiled in return. "I was hoping we spend some time together, talk..."

Caitlin looked disbelieving. "Really?"

"Yes, really, you knucklehead." JC said with a teasing grin. "If you're feeling brave, I was going to offer to cook you lunch out at the Compound."

"You cook?" Caitlin asked skeptically.

"Well, I order Chinese takeout really well." JC said with an embarrassed grin. "I'm supposed to hang at the Compound today so that I'm around as things come up. I was hoping you might join me." JC said sincerely.

"I'd like that. Why don't I drive myself over so that I can take off when you actually start 'working'?". Caitlin said with a smile.

"Sounds good. Just follow my jeep there...Lonnie is out in the van, so he'll bring up the rear. Ok?"

"Ok." Caitlin looked down. "Uh, why don't I run up and change before we go."

"Why? You look perfect." JC said simply.

Caitlin rolled her eyes. "Yeah. Right."

JC put his hand on her arm and looked directly into her eyes. "You do." He paused. "I really want to work through whatever happened last night. I can't stop thinking about you, and I'll be damned if I'm going to let you slip through my fingers."

Caitlin's breath caught in her throat. She looked into his beautiful blue eyes, and melted on the spot. "Me too. After you feed me some tasty Chinese food, I'll spill my guts. Deal?" She smiled slightly.

"Deal."

(Two hours later)

JC and Caitlin fought over the last egg roll as they sat at the huge kitchen table located inside the Compound. As soon as they had stepped into the relaxed, comfortable atmosphere of Johnny Wright's home, otherwise known as the Compound, the tension surrounding Caitlin and JC had melted. They talked and laughed through lunch as though the night before had never happened.

Occasionally, their meal was interrupted by the other guys stopping in and say hi, or grabbing a snack from the kitchen. Also, countless techs and security people walked through the house, but for the most part, Caitlin and JC were alone. When they had first arrived on the property, Caitlin had met Johnny Wright, the group's manager. She wondered what he thought of one of his stars bringing a girl to his house, but JC seemed unconcerned, so Caitlin put it out of her mind.

"You about finished?" JC asked, as he started to clear the table.

"I'm stuffed! That was great...thanks for lunch." Caitlin replied, helping gather takeout boxes and plates.

"You're welcome. Thanks for coming with me. Gives me an excuse not to be upstairs answering fan mail or working on vocals." JC said easily.

"Well, now I feel guilty!" Caitlin replied.

"Don't." JC paused. "You feel like walking around the property? Get away from all the folks floating around here?"

"Sounds great." Caitlin replied. Moments later, JC had thrown a light jacket on and told Lonnie that he and Caitlin were heading out for a walk. Lonnie didn't follow them, and merely nodded his assent.

"No security?" Caitlin asked as they stepped outside.

"Because of the security surrounding the property, we're safe as long as we don't make a break for the mall or anything." JC said with a wistful smile.

"Do you miss malls and movies and Wal-Mart?" Caitlin asked. She'd often been curious about how their lives must be so different from the way they were 5 years ago.

"I miss everything. I miss buying my own groceries, and just going to see a movie on the spur of the moment, and I even miss being able to walk into a Taco Bell without causing a riot." JC said, a sad smile on his face.

"I can't even imagine." Caitlin replied. "But then again, sometimes 'real life' isn't all it's cracked up to be." She added. "But rest assured, if you ever feel brave and want to head for the mall, I'm up for it."

JC grinned and took her hand in his. "Sounds great."

The walked in comfortable silence for a few minutes, giving Caitlin the chance to steel her nerves. She couldn't decide how much to reveal to JC, so she decided she'd play it by ear.

"So...last night..." Caitlin faltered slightly.

"You want to talk about it?" JC asked quietly. "You don't have to. I'm just...well, I was confused. But seeing you today..." He paused. "Well, I'm glad you're ok. You are ok, right?"

Caitlin smiled softly. "Yeah, I'm ok. I want to apologize again for my behavior last night. That was tremendously uncool."

JC laughed quietly. "What happened?"

Caitlin and JC walked over to a small dock overlooking the pond located on Johnny's property. Caitlin sighed deeply and looked out over the water. "In the past, I've had a series of not-nice boyfriends. The latest not-nice one was last summer."

Caitlin paused as JC looked at her expectantly. He could see how difficult it was for her to talk about this, so he laid a comforting hand on her back as she continued. "He tended to go on power trips about stuff, me included. He was very, um, demanding. He would grab me and kiss me and.and stuff, even when I didn't want him too."

"He forced you to kiss him?" JC asked.

"Um. Yeah. Anyhow, he stuck around long after we had broken up and harassed me, and I guess I've been a little gun-shy of guys ever since. Anyhow, when we were...you know...last night, I just looked into your eyes and saw the same intense looks he used to get, and I just got scared and backed off. I'm so sorry." Caitlin concluded.

"I'm sorry I scared you. That was never my intention." JC said.

"I know." Caitlin looked away and out over the water again.

"Do you still like him?" JC asked.

"Absolutely not. That thought never crosses my mind. He just...it feels like I can't escape him sometimes, you know? It's like an emotional hostage situation sometimes."

JC and Caitlin stood in silence for a few moments, watching the water lap at the shore, both lost in their own thoughts.

"JC, I really like you. I like being with you. I just...can we take it slow?" Caitlin buried her face in her hands. "Oh god, that sounded so dorky and 15 year oldish!"

JC laughed out loud. "Caitlin, you rock." He paused and turned her chin so she was looking at him. "I'll do whatever you want me to, as long as I can keep seeing you. Ok?"

"Ok." Caitlin responded with a smile. JC bent his head and laid a kiss on her lips. They both held the kiss tentatively, but then the kiss slowly deepened, and they wrapped their arms around each other. Minutes later, JC pulled his face back so he could look into Caitlin's eyes. "So, we're ok?"

"I'd say we're ok." Caitlin reaffirmed.

chapter twelve